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Bail Bonds and Bellies: Getting Yourself in a “Hole” Lot of Trouble

Friday, December 7, 2012

stuck in jailFrom the movies Escape from Alcatraz to The Shawshank Redemption, the American public is always enamored with a good prison escape film.  Maybe it’s the public's infatuation with things like bail bond agents, bounty hunters and prison gaurds...or maybe its the suspense or even the great acting.   Whatever it is, there is something that really gets people going about a person using his brain to outthink the prison guards and escape from the inescapable.  But movies are movies and as much as reality tries to follow in its footsteps, many times people just end up tripping over themselves along the way.  This is exactly what happened to Brazilian inmate Rafael Valadao as he tried to escape from jail earlier this week. 

The whole situation played out very much like every other prison escape film.  The inmate slowly and methodically over a long period of time, scraped away at the wall of his jail cell.  Eventually, the hole grew big enough for a full size man to crawl through.  Unfortunately for Mr. Valadao, he underestimated one critical component of the escape.  He built his escape hole to accommodate his driver’s license weight (come on now…we all take a few pounds off when we fill out that form).  Anyway, this minor miscalculation ended up being Mr. Valadao’s downfall.   He dug an escape hole for a full size man, but he was actually a full “plus” size man.

As you can probably imagine, the escape started out pretty well.  Mr. Valadao’s skinnier accomplice slid right through the hole and took off.  Mr. Valadao was not so lucky.  After getting half way through the hole, he got stuck. Like Winnie the Pooh getting stuck in Rabbit’s hole, Mr. Valadao was going nowhere anytime soon.  Some say it was the high calorie prison food, while some say it was pure vanity and body image denial.  Either way, Mr. Valadao provided prison staff with an image that they will probably not forget anytime soon.  Read the original article below.

Original article: Burly prisoner gets stuck in wall during jailbreak